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N., 22, British-born Bangla-deshi: "You will be banned from the family"

 

Tina, 20, from Germany: "You have become Muslim - how could you do that to your family?"

 

Nadia, 25, British-born Pakistani: "I am fortunate to live in two worlds"

 

Mahsa, 26, from Iran: "My Catholic boyfriend is welcome"

Religion - peace or repression?
5 Muslim girls reveal their experiences

'I would do anything
to make him Asian'

A sleeveless shirt, jeans and trainers. If it wasn’t for the almond eyes and the Asian features, Dian S. could pass for any Western girl.

If she were, she wouldn’t have to hide her boyfriend. She is sitting cross-legged in his London apartment and talks about their love.

A love that she considers so great she is determined to marry him. “Typical for me, even back in Jakarta I was always crazy about Caucasian men,” she smiles.

Jakarta, Indonesia, that is where she grew up and where her parents still live – the only people who must not know about the happiness she found in London.

Her family is “pretty liberal”; she was allowed to go on dates with Muslim boys, even kissing was okay.

But although her parents don’t intend to arrange a marriage for her, they expect her to marry a Muslim.

The religious accountant agreed, until she moved to London for professional reasons and fell in love head over heals with Lars.

Her pretty smile ceases, she frowns. “Honestly, at the moment I would give anything to make him Asian,” she says with a sigh.

It is tough for her to constantly lie to her parents. Rumours have already spread in the community.


But when her mother called and demanded the truth, Dian didn’t have the heart to tell her.

“My mum was really upset about it, oh my God, I’m even more scared to tell her now than ever,” she exclaims.

In the worst case, she believes, her parents might not acknowledge Dian and Lars as a couple and refuse to see them, but they would never ban her from the family or even worse.

“Although… I can’t be sure,” Dian muses, “years ago my uncle was banned by my grandmother for something he had done.

"Actually, if my grandmother can do it, there is a possibility that my mother could do the same...

" This is kind of scary, because they might react in a way that I haven’t even thought of…”

The pretty girl falls silent; she is tired of thinking all possibilities over and over again. Tired and furious.

“I am not doing something illegal, I am not asking my mum if I may become a terrorist and blow up a house!”

She may not be doing something illegal in terms of British law.

But Islamic law, the Sharia, clearly forbids Muslim women to marry non-Muslims.

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